Calming Strategies for Young Children

School counselors are amazing. When deciding what to be in life, these are the sweet people who thought ... "I want to work with kids. I want to be a person they can talk to when the world feels upside down. I want them to know there is someone who will listen and help them feel safe." And when a school counselor gets to counsel, it's a beautiful thing. But if your school counselor is anything like mine, his or her duties might also include being the site's testing coordinator, IEP specialist, and Child Study Team facilitator, leaving very little time for actual counseling.

Plus, in most elementary schools, there's one counselor and HUNDREDS of children. That's math even I can do.  

As a classroom teacher, knowing how to deescalate and redirect behaviors is part of the job and I've learned a lot over the years from the specialists I've been fortunate enough to work with. We are with our students several hours each day. We know them. And we can be their classroom counselor when things feel upside down. 

Like now.  

(Actually, I might need some counseling.)

#SoOverCovid 

It begins by creating an awareness of emotions and nurturing a community where kids feel safe to talk about their feelings. These are some of my favorite books for introducing children to all the different emotions we experience from day to day. It's important to name them and to talk about them. Sharing your own personal stories of times you've felt happiness, anger, fear, and sadness is a great way to normalize the topic, encouraging your students to follow your lead when they feel ready.

You can also read and discuss stories where the characters experience a variety of emotions, ranging from worry (Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes) to frustration (I Love My New Toy! by Mo Willems). Authors typically structure stories in a way that helps you talk about what event led to the problem, what impact it had on the character's emotions, and how it was solved. Your students will probably want to share some of their own personal connections and that's a perfect time to talk about managing emotions and solving problems. Following up with role-play can be a fun and effective strategy for kids who enjoy visualizing and performing.

I've seen many creative Calm Down Corners on Pinterest. Those are great places for children to go when they need a little breather ... just a moment to settle and regain control when they're feeling overstimulated, frustrated, or anxious. I think a few kids need our help taking it one step further though, and that's why I recommend personalized calming kits for some. Some children need their own go-to basket of items that are specific to their soothing needs. The example above is perfect for a child who finds solace mostly in tactile activities, particularly unraveling and winding balls of yarn. Counting soft pom-poms and stretching the slinky are also calming for this student, but it's important to spend time finding what works for each child. Effective calming strategies are as unique as each person.

I created a set of resources to help K-2 teachers coach children through stressful emotions. It includes a student book (color and B&W versions) to help children learn different ways kids manage challenging emotional moments. The simple illustrations provide practical examples and the language invites kids to think about their own needs and preferences.

From there, they can choose or design a bookmark to help them recall some of the calming strategies they would like to try when they need to self-regulate and regain a sense of control. 

The set also includes mini-posters for teaching the strategies and details about how our bodies react physically to emotions like worry, fear, anger, sadness, and embarrassment, but my favorite pieces of the resource are the processing prompts that help children reflect and process by drawing or writing. 

Not every kid will want to write or draw, especially in the heat of the moment. Sometimes, the language of these prompts can simply be used to start a discussion and even blank paper will work in a pinch ... not everything has to be fancy or prepared. Life gets really real sometimes and it's ok if all we show up with is our heart and the time to listen. (Actually, that's everything.)

But when kids are ready to process the situation, I have found that some hesitate to draw because they think they "don't know how." So early in the year, I hold a little How to Draw Faces art session. I tell the kids it's easier to draw emotions on faces than they think and that most of it is just knowing how and where to draw simple lines and shapes. (Studying popular emojis will help you a lot with this.😂)

Give them a sheet full of blank circles and let them practice with you ... go step by step with each face. Talk about the emotion it conveys ... maybe even label them and let them keep the sheet as a resource ... or hang a chart in the classroom. You'll find they use it throughout the day, even during writing workshop when they're illustrating their personal narratives. 

👉Grab This Sheet Here👈

If you have a favorite idea or strategy that works for you and your students, share it in the comments below. Teaching is hard enough without always reinventing the wheel and we LOVE collecting ideas that work! 

In the meantime, you can check out the ideas I've collected on My Pinterest Page. There are yoga flow videos, ideas for art therapy, directions for making stress balls, and so much more! Honestly, what would we do without Pinterest? 

You might also enjoy this related post: How Emojis Help Kids Understand BIG Feelings 😢🤢😬😡😳

Happy teaching!